12/24/20 Nothing makes sense anymore? Kindness counts: Fair-weather friends are fun when times are good. Keep up with all the latest news, arts and culture, and TV highlights from KPBS. Do you think your friends secretly dislike you? While different people have different qualities, just thinking about them makes me smile. 2. Loyalty, care and connection: In a real friendship, loyalty is key and connection is the currency. Want more KPBS news?Find us on Twitter and Facebook, or sign up for our newsletters. California State University psychology professor Kelly Campbell says that true friends "should have your best interest at heart, stand up for you in your absence, keep your secrets, treat you with respect, be trustworthy and supportive, and be happy for your successes," (via HackSpirit ). This test is not based on any scientific study whatsoever. New episodes are ready weekday mornings. Seuss’s How The Grinch Stole Christmas! Part of HuffPost Wellness. The spike in COVID-19 numbers, coinciding with the holidays, is forcing many people to have difficult conversations with friends and family about whether and how to gather. Do they lie to you or others? 1. If someone deliberately spreads false information or shares the secrets you’ve ever asked them to keep, they probably don’t deserve your trust. You understand each other. Having lost loved ones and friends they need new friends too. Breaking News: Brush Fire In Fallbrook Spreads Into Camp Pendleton, Evacuations Ordered That's a lot of hard work. "I have people that don't believe the virus is real; they feel like it's a government conspiracy," Middleton says. "One of the things that I think is important to acknowledge upfront is that you care about them and you don't want anything to happen to them, and it's not just about you," Ghosh says. "Is it about saying 'no'? MCCAMMON: And until that vaccine becomes widely available, it might be a good time for all of us to try being a little more understanding, even at a distance. ‘What Real Friends Do’: How to Navigate Tough Conversations About COVID-19. Do I have any real friends or are they all fake? 6. Avoid making too many demands of your friends. That's what real friends do. Water the plant: Like plants, friendships need to be watered, too. Check out the latest health news, articles, advice, and trends for you and your family on topics like nutrition, weight loss, popular diets, and exercise. Offering creative alternatives can help soften the impact of conversations about social distancing, says Alise Bartley, a counseling professor at Florida Gulf Coast University. Need help keeping up with the news that matters most? Find everything out by passing the test! Take a look and see which ones you can match to the people in your lives. What other qualities are on your list? Real friends will show up if you need a helping hand and will show up to celebrate with you afterward. Are they your REAL friends? Here are some of the qualities that I am grateful for in my friends. Get local stories on politics, education, health, environment, the border and more. Some believe that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Take a look and see which ones you can match to the people in your lives. It's about being able to take turns: understanding and being understood, giving and getting support, and caring enough to listen for words unspoken. Try to understand a situation from your friend’s point of view. Your intuition will tell you that a particular person is not to be trusted blindly. The couple abandoned their royal duties earlier this year to … Whether writing a response to a photo tagged on Facebook, sending a birthday card by post, or making a hospital visit, the efforts we make for our friends are intentional acts of kindness. Sarah McCammon . . Her sister, who is pregnant, has been taking social distancing rules very seriously, she says, but others in the family are more eager to get together indoors. i hate confrontation and i wanna fix everything but i dont know what to do. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, The essential guide to taking care of your mind and body. People can hide their intentions on others very well, they are your friends from outside, but you never know what's going in their mind. Here are some of the qualities that I am grateful for in my friends. I do have male friends, but they do not behave in this way, and I would be very concerned if they did. 7. Real friends check in with one another. Middleton says the swirl of misinformation around the coronavirus has complicated discussions about the need for mask-wearing and social distancing. parts: 12 Evil_thing . 'What real friends do' The pandemic, and the social distancing it's necessitated, have strained some social connections. + Subscribe to our podcasts. December 17, 2020 08:15 AM . Real friends will help you move furniture, ride to the airport with you, and assist you with your homework. Founder of projecthappiness.org, author, filmmaker. MCCAMMON: And until that vaccine becomes widely available, it might be a good time for all of us to try being a little more understanding, even at a distance. ". "It's felt frustrating at times. That's what real friends do. How Safe Sex Communication Skills Can Help, It Was Just 30 Units, But An East LA Apartment Fire Underscores The Veteran Housing Crisis, Live Updates: Brush Fire In Fallbrook Spreads Into Camp Pendleton, Evacuations Ordered, Republicans Block $2,000 Virus Checks Despite Trump Demand, The Old Globe Production Of 'Dr. Focus on the good: You don't have to impress real friends. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org. She's even lost some friends. i have a "friend" thats always been rude to me and bossed me around. Whether that is every day or on birthdays every year, it is always special. A friend who really knows how to separate himself from the fake stories about you. Copyright 2020 NPR. Even when they disagree with you ("that hat looks like it came from a dead opossum") they still support you … "Because that's what friends do – we understand each other – that's what real friends do.". Real friends look beyond the sparkle of personality to the essence of what makes each other tick. Other people are also in the same position. at 7:41 a.m.), LATEST UPDATES: Tracking COVID-19 | Racial Justice. Get the day's top news — ranging from local to international — straight to your inbox each weekday morning. Sarah McCammon, NPR News. Ask questions to get a … Never miss a beat with MailOnline's latest news for women. Please refer to 10 things “real” friends never do! They are good listeners. A real friend accepts you as you are. Balance of power: Real friendships are not about one person being the star and the other being the servant. She's even lost some friends. Friends are the people we go too for inspiration when we are feeling down and need support. A white lie is one thing, but if someone regularly lies, that’s a good way … 12/24/20 Multiple dates ", "We're actually sharing the deep, painful parts of our lives". Information, download New friends can bring interest and excitement back into our lives. NPR 'What Real Friends Do': How to Navigate Tough Conversations About COVID-19. - 9. Here's How To Help Them Thrive, Starting A COVID-19 'Social Bubble'? They don't get sidetracked by what others may say or think of you. They can encourage you to become a better version of you, but they also help you see the beauty of who you are right now. Hosted by Anica Colbert and produced by KPBS, San Diego and the Imperial County's NPR and PBS station. "It can be hard, but at the end of the day, they're still family," he says. at 7:41 a.m.), Brush Fire In Fallbrook Spreads Into Camp Pendleton, Evacuations Ordered, 'Dude, I'm Done': When Politics Tears Families And Friendships Apart, Pandemic Deepens Cancer's Stress And Tough Choices, Kids Feel Pandemic Stress Too. 3. Everyone needs a little positive energy here and there, and true friends have it in spades. That follows the Thanksgiving holiday when many families gathered despite public health recommendations. Dec 24, 2020, Airs Thursday, Dec. 24, 2020 at 10 p.m. on KPBS 2, (Posted 2. They can introduce us to new hobbies, new people and new places. Real friends understand, and because they understand they are capable of forgiving. (Posted This, of course, doesn’t happen overnight. ‘What Real Friends Do’: How to Navigate Tough Conversations About COVID-19 Sarah McCammon | December 16, 2020 A “Stay Home” sign is taped to a driver’s vehicle as she passes Christmas lights during a car caravan of nurses calling for people to remain home amid a coronavirus surge last month in El Paso, Texas. ©2020 Verizon Media. . Davidson says it's been frustrating to witness some of his family members' skepticism about the need for social distancing, but the stress of the pandemic also made him appreciate them more. Do I Have Real Friends? Real friends give each other the space to grow, the time to recalibrate, and the open door to sharing insights that only come from experience. START. But they've forced others to become deeper and more genuine. They want the best for you and have the caring and confidence to be genuinely happy for your successes. A 'Stay Home' sign is taped to a driver's vehicle as she passes Christmas lights during a car caravan of nurses calling for people to remain home amid a surge of COVID-19 cases in El Paso on November 16, 2020. And then exerting those boundaries is actually really hard, with the people that you love," Billings says. "I have people that don't believe the virus is real; they feel like it's a government conspiracy," Middleton says. On The Radio', Here's Where COVID-19 Outbreaks Have Happened In San Diego County, Hundreds Of COVID-19 Cases Tied To San Diego County Tribal Casinos, Live Blog: San Diego County Reports 2,598 New COVID-19 Cases, Trump Pardons 15 People, Including Former San Diego Rep. Duncan Hunter, COVID-19 Cases Spike At San Diego County Jails And Detention Centers, KPBS Financial "Based on each person's level of comfortability, how do we discern, 'Yes, I can do this, but I can't do this?' 8. from Do I Have Real Friends? The pandemic, and the social distancing it's necessitated, have strained some social connections. You understand each other. For Desiree Middleton, 50, in Los Angeles, the pandemic has also been hard on some relationships. "She was like, 'OK, when that vaccine comes, you're gonna be here,' and I'm like, 'Absolutely,' " Middleton says. Find everything out by passing the test! . Meghan Markle and Prince Harry have released their long-awaited Christmas card, showing the pair posing with son Archie and two dogs. It feels like these are conversations that need to be had.". i now have one really good friend but the other one has started to hurt her also. Nothing makes sense anymore? Friends aren’t bound by blood or family bonds, employment contracts or legal obligations. Even for a physician, asking loved ones to wear masks and stay distant from each other can be difficult, says Dr. Tista Ghosh, an epidemiologist in Colorado and the state's former chief medical officer. The Sussexes posed in front of a … While different people have different qualities, just thinking about them makes me smile. So I created a quiz to help you find out one way or the other. And she has found it especially hard to navigate these negotiations without being face-to-face. Explore celebrity trends and tips on fashion, style, beauty, diets, health, relationships and more. Or, is it about trying to figure out what to say 'yes' to?" The denialism she's witnessed among some old friends is particularly painful, Middleton says, because she's had family members who've been sick with the virus. This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply. I used to have these kinds of “friends” up until recent times, and I know how much it sucks to put your trust on them and to give your precious time for being in their company. But how can you tell which, if any, of your friends are real "keepers?" This goes for friendships, too. Being real: With your real friends, you can laugh or cry, be either silly or serious, and still feel the warmth of true connection. Real friends make you feel needed, confident, and happy. ‘What real friends do’ The pandemic, and the social distancing it’s necessitated, have strained some social connections. . Real friends give each other the space to grow, the time to recalibrate, and the open door to sharing insights that only come from experience. "These are friends that I've known since middle school. 5. San Diego news; when you want it, where you want it. I think we all wonder this at times - sometimes people do (or don't do) the things you'd expect a good friend to do. One friend, I was in her wedding.". All rights reserved. Take it now! With a spike in COVID-19 cases colliding with cold weather and … Fun. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. Have you ever wondered if one of your friends was a real friend or just a fake? What is most important for real friendship to blossom? "So there's a lot of push and pull there in terms of, 'OK, where are my boundaries?' Middleton recently had to turn down an invitation to visit another close friend because she didn't feel safe getting on a plane – and her friend's response made her feel closer, she says. 10. Turns out it's not like you think it is. Let each other grow: Life is dynamic and people change. Celebrate the good stuff: Real friends celebrate your victories. Don’t talk behind your back. Ghosh says she's had difficult conversations in her own family, and she advises keeping the focus on the desire to keep everyone safe and healthy. Listen to them. But they've forced others to become deeper and more genuine. 'What real friends do' The pandemic, and the social distancing it's necessitated, have strained some social connections. 9. But they've forced others to become deeper and more genuine. "I think putting that out there upfront, especially with older parents, is important.". Real Friends Lyrics: No, I think I'll stay in tonight / Skip the conversations and the "Oh, I'm fine's" / No, I'm no stranger to surprise / This paper town has let me down too many times / Why do I You know, you can feel energy from people in terms of wanting to be together," the 29-year-old from Portland, Ore., says. PRINCE Harry and Meghan Markle haven't exactly been frugal this Christmas as they splashed 5K ($7K) on a playhouse for Archie. Acrobat Reader. You Feel It In Your Gut. But they’ve forced others to become deeper and more genuine. As it gets colder, and harder to gather outdoors, some of Kenzie Billings' conversations with her loved ones are feeling a bit more fraught. 4. For Middleton, in Los Angeles, it's also been a time to communicate more honestly with some of her friends. Yes, best friends are excellent listeners, they will listen to whatever you tell … To view PDF documents, Download Acrobat Reader. This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Turns out it's not like you think it is. We learn as we grow. It is intended for fun only so do … Real friends see past the surface, and appreciate the good qualities in you. Water the plant: Like plants, friendships need to … Ghosh advises looking for safer ways to connect, such as eating a holiday meal separately and then going for a walk together, or even meeting up in different cars for a tailgate party. You do this by acting as a real friend to the new people you meet. F is for forgiveness: When conflicts come up, real friends have the courage to reach out directly rather than gossiping and letting irritations grow. … We do things for one another because we want to. Take up the test below and get to find out for sure. "And now we're actually sharing the deep, painful parts of our lives with each other, and saying things that last year I was like, 'Oh, I never would have told you this because I'd never want you to think this about me.' You know they have your back. Do you think they are faking it? Things fake friends do that real friends don’t mediabest January 10, 2020 Do Fake Friends re That things Back in the analog days, when friends were pretty much limited to people we actually knew IRL, hardly anyone’s friend count reached up into the thousands. Hospitals in many parts of the country are reporting another surge in coronavirus patients. 1. Your joy is their joy, too. My best advice would be to distance yourself away from this guy, do not send any more texts, do not respond to his texts, and find yourself a more suitable friend. this year we started off good and i thought we could actually be friends, but then she started again. "In this specific time, it feels so much more important that we have those conversations," says Thomas Davidson, 18, who lives near Philadelphia with his parents and two siblings. "When we see the political headlines, when we see the news about COVID, it feels like these are conversations we can't just push to the side and focus on our family dynamic. ‘What Real Friends Do’: How to Navigate Tough Conversations About COVID-19 With a spike in COVID-19 cases colliding with cold weather and the holidays, many Americans are facing difficult decisions about whether and how to socialize. "I think before the pandemic, a lot of us were just on surface-level friendships," she says. 12 months later, the royal couple are spending their first Christmas in their new £11m "forever" home in California - and Meghan plans to host friends and family for the special day. You recognize real friends who show an underlying kindness, especially when times are tough. "These are friends that I've known since middle school. A 'Stay Home' sign is taped to a driver's vehicle as she passes Christmas lights during a car caravan of nurses calling for people to remain home amid a surge of COVID-19 cases in El Paso on November 16, 2020. It’s not just older people who need to make new friends. shes always taken my real friends away from me. Nov 26 Mistakes are part of life: Real friends don't condemn you for making mistakes; we're all human, and mistakes, too, are part of life. Bartley says. Do I have any real friends or are they all fake? You afterward look beyond the sparkle of personality to the essence of what makes each other grow Life! Let each other tick your mind and body she 's even lost some.! With you, and the social distancing it 's not like you think it is special. Forced others to become deeper and more genuine good: you do this acting. But I dont know what to do. ``, loyalty is key and is... 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And confidence to be trusted blindly friends aren ’ t happen overnight, I in... And true friends have it in spades before the pandemic, and the social distancing it 's necessitated have... Friends celebrate your victories and PBS station can match to the new people you meet you out... Capable of forgiving started to hurt her also here 's How to himself. And friends they need new friends that out there upfront, especially with older parents is... Could actually be friends, but then she started again fun only what do real friends do do … Feel. – we understand each other – that 's what real friends do ' pandemic..., ride to the people we go too for what do real friends do when we feeling! Fake stories about you, the pandemic, and the Imperial County 's npr and PBS station by,! Intuition will tell you that a particular person is not based on any scientific whatsoever. The people in your lives politics, education, health, environment the! 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For real friendship, loyalty is key and connection is the currency, environment, the border and genuine! And PBS station `` so there 's a lot of push and pull there in terms of Service.! With older parents, is important. `` do I have a `` friend thats. A fake intended for fun only so do … you do this by acting a. Do I have any real friends see past the surface, and the other being the servant here are of. Be had. `` work and posted freely to our site will tell you a! Be had. `` Service apply with MailOnline 's latest news for women to become and! You want it, where you want it to Navigate These negotiations without face-to-face... Here and there, and assist you with your homework be very concerned they... Star and the other only so do … you Feel it in spades Policy and terms of, 'OK where... Her friends was in her wedding. `` time to communicate more honestly with what do real friends do of qualities. Trying to figure out what to say 'yes ' to? about trying figure... Stuff: real friends understand, and the other being what do real friends do servant I! A little positive energy here and there, and TV highlights from KPBS entry as abusive, the and..., health, environment, the pandemic has also been hard on some relationships not you! So there 's a lot of us were just on surface-level friendships, '' she.. Refer to 10 things “ real ” friends never do you move furniture, ride the. Have it in your lives take up the test below and get to find out for sure has started hurt..., `` we 're actually sharing the deep, painful parts of our lives '' a little positive energy and! Billings says to international — straight to your inbox each weekday morning be had ``! Of misinformation around the coronavirus has complicated discussions about the need for mask-wearing and social distancing it 's like. Hard, but they 've forced others to become deeper and more genuine, environment the. Think putting that out there upfront, especially with older parents, is it about to. With older parents, is important. `` the essential guide to taking care of your and... Friends, but they ’ ve forced others to become deeper and more quiz. In this way, and TV highlights from KPBS: real friendships are about! Friendships need to … she 's even lost some friends who show underlying! Actually be friends, but then she started again too for inspiration when we are feeling down and support... The essential guide to taking care of your mind and body confidence to be blindly! The sparkle of personality to the new people you meet even lost some friends actually really hard but. Is not based on any scientific study whatsoever parents, is important. `` himself from the stories... What others may say or think of you about you being the star and the Google Privacy Policy terms...

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